Teaching Oneself

Have you ever been to school? Been taught anything by anyone?

If you have, chances are you’ve had some good, some bad, some moderate learning experiences.

Have you ever taught? To a friend, to a co-worker, to a child?

If you have, chances are you were able to remember those things in a much better way. Enjoying it the whole time.

I have been attending an RMT (Registered Massage Therapy) course recently, and the teacher is a super entertaining, awesome human being and a natural at everything: drawing, humor, simplifying difficult concepts into baby food that people can swallow and even into micro-organisms for the former-scientists in the classroom.

He recently talked about what he calls “active memory”, the first time I’ve heard of such a concept, where he suggested in examples about it where you can make flash cards, with the question, for example:

What is the origin, insertion and action of a trapezius? And you would have the answer on the back.

Of course, there is always another layer behind what people say. And he later went on to say that “active memory” has nothing to do with flash cards, but the ability to teach. He even suggested that one could teach oneself. Obvious, yes?

And then I realized, on my drive home. Who’s the best student I can always teach? The answer, was myself!

I was quite surprised. Though I knew what he meant at the time, because isn’t teaching yourself just… “learning”? It’s something more.

A little more conscious. A little more love is needed to teach oneself, or myself. Basically, really be able to teach yourself in the way that isn’t just habitual.

For example, brushing your teeth.

Do you really know how to brush your teeth? Can you explain to a 5 year old, why and when is the best time to brush? Do you just say to him or her, the little wee thing, just put the toothpaste onto your toothbrush, and start brushing?

Then make a slightly sarcastic joke, which only you find funny, about working on tying their shoes tomorrow (leaving abruptly).

Or do you tell them kindly, it’s fantastic that you are learning to brush your teeth by yourself! When you brush your teeth properly, you can not only look better to your friends and family, but also you feel and smell better.

You remind them about how, didn’t you know? An apple once a day makes the doctor go away. And relate it to how when you eat an apple, the natural fibers actually clean your teeth!

And you keep sharing your knowledge, about that time you had a funny teeth brushing incident where you used your little brother’s toothbrush and started freaking out because you were still afraid of germs at the time.

More and more, about this and that, flossing and brushing twice a day and balabalabla.

To see their eyes widen, as they realize you care about them and that they will always remember these funny life stories combined with little lessons you shared with all your heart. It also takes something out of your essence to give to them, courage that your jokes, your information and how you present yourself is received well. Teaching well requires trust. Which can be hard, especially when their attention spans are about as focused as a dog surrounded by bone-like toys. Maybe the kid didn’t listen to the joke, or only heard the joke, but that doesn’t matter. What made it a great teaching and learning thing for everyone was that everyone had a great time, and learned as much from the experience as they could absorb at the time.

To teach yourself like this, it’s also a beautiful thing.

What were some of the best experiences where you taught yourself something? Think.

Maybe it was how to talk to a girl you were attracted to without being nervous. Some people (like me), just talked to/ asked out a 100 attractive girls in a row, in a span of a month, and was done with it.

How is this related to teaching kids teeth brushing?

Well, it just is.

While I talked to these random girls I met on the subway, on the street, at Chapters, in the library, at the school cafeteria or in the shopping centre, I kept teaching myself like so:

“Hey sweetheart, how about a date?” I already have a boyfriend (while looking at me up and down humorously).

It was awesome, I didn’t actually want to date them, as I chose to be busy with school and work, and most of them already had boyfriends. Or at least that’s what they told me. Some of them actually invited me to a bar or parties they were going to that night or to go to their cottage with their friends.

I regret not having enough courage at the time to say yes to any of these events, especially since I was deathly afraid of alcohol, but those are stories for another time. Soon, I promise

Anyways, what made this a great learning experience for me? It took courage, and trust that the conversations would go over well and that it would be a great time for everyone involved. Not all of them did, some didn’t care and didn’t respond, but it was clear that everyone had as funny or as eye opening experience as they could receive at the time.

It’s just fun to teach yourself. You develop your capacity to express more love. And I find I like to separate teaching oneself and “learning”. It’s not the same thing. One is putting everything on the line and putting yourself out there and giving it your all, and the other is related to boredom and grind.

Choose what’s on your menu, but for me the choice is obvious.